Last week was probably one of the most emotionally challenging weeks I've had in a while. Not much happened to me personally, but many around me felt suffering or joy to the upmost extent.
The one thing that did happen to me personally was one of the joyous moments. Spencer and I went on a double date last week with a beautiful couple that we've been in love with for a while now but haven't really been able to spend time with. There are times in life when you meet someone and you just do not connect with them whatsoever. Then there are times in life when you meet people and you can't imagine your life ever being without them again. Conversations flow and smiles and laughs fill your time together. This is what happened with us. We sat at our favorite restaurant for 3 hours and discussed our lives and our personal relationships with the Lord. I truly do not know if Spencer and I have ever felt such a Christ-led connection like this before. We were beaming when we left them and are trying to see them at least weekly now.
While this was happening, though, one of my past coworkers was grieving in a way no one should ever have to in their lives. She lost her baby and the world turned black. I truly do not know if I have ever imagined a pain so awful in my life. I went home to see her and had to see the sweetest angel put to rest. There is no way to come to grips with this fully, ever. Please send your prayers her way, my friends.
Meanwhile, another friend of mine was getting proposed to by the man she has loved for 4 and a half years. She was fully shocked and surprised and every special person in her life was there to celebrate. I felt so much joy for her because getting engaged has been the sweetest season of my life, especially when you've waited so long for it. The joy of finally beginning to start your life with the person you love above all else is a joy only inferior to the joy that comes from loving God. It's the good stuff, as I like to say.
And yet again, on the other side of the spectrum, two people that I look up to so much for their faith were being ridiculed beyond belief for their beliefs about our heavenly Father. Someone decided to take their beliefs and make fun of them and make such horrible comments about them, unlike I've ever heard before. But this situation was, and continues to be, very bittersweet. Because so many people ridiculed them, so many more got to hear about the Lord for maybe the first time. I think that planting the seed is something we overlook so much in our Christianity. Yes you may be ridiculed for your faith and people may speak such evils against you, but still, they heard about the Lord. If one person has one thought in his/her head that says "Hey, this is kinda cool. Maybe I should learn more," you have made a beautiful impact on them.
Ok Maria. Where on Earth are you going with this emotional rollercoaster of a post? All of these people know the Lord, and I'm so thankful they do. The joyous moments felt this week were felt because the people know what the love of God feels like. They are examples of it in their friendship and in their relationships. The horrible moments felt this week are only possible to bear with the Lord. When I went to see my friend who lost her baby, no words came to my mouth. I literally have never been at such a loss for words in my life. But I think it's because, no words I could say could ever give her comfort. The Lord is the only person that will see her through this time and giver her a promise of hope. This week I had to write an "Identity Paper" for my class. It had to be 2500 words aka 7 pages double spaced. I talked about my schooling, society's effect on me, about CHWC, and about my faith. But if I was able to write what I truly wanted to write about my identity, I would say "I am God's and that is all that matters."
God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear.
Psalm 46: 1-2